Have you reached that place where you are sick and tired of being sick and tired ?
Ask yourself what is my motivation ? Why do I keep doing the same thing over and over again ?
Do you want something different than what you are getting ? Chances are if your honest with yourself the answer to that is yes, yet I keep falling into that same pattern of defeat and relapse , doing well for a period of time and then going back to the exact things that cause so much pain.
Has the pain of doing the same thing over and over again, caused you to be depressed or worried, baffled and discouraged ? Well if that is how you may be feeling today, I have excellent news for you, the news is that you and ONLY you have the ability to change . You have the source of power within you to create a new life, dedicated to walking in new ways.
How do we change, how do we break-up from the very things that brought so much pleasure, or at least in the moment we believe that they fill that empty void, until after we finish using that particular thing , then guilt , remorse, shame, and failure consume us, taking us over and keeping us trapped in a cycle of " Here I go again, I cant believe I did that yet again, Why do I keep doing the same things ?"
Friends , I have so much experience in gaining ground , leaving destructive patterns in the past and then after a little while returning to them. Today I have found a way to stay on the path, of correction, discipline and Joy ! Is everyday bubbling over with happiness and Joy, of course not, however that is the goal I am seeking and in doing so , I have to reach beyond myself onto a power, that is so much greater than I am. 1 John 4:4 tells us that ( You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world) That scripture teaches us that we have the power to overcome anything as long as we use God, believe in God and live for his promise and not to the flesh. You are from God and he wants the best for you !
Lets talk about food , the very substance that we must have in order to live, Food . Food is an enemy of many, food comforts the soul, food is a conversation piece, food is a art, food is good, and food is bad and here in the USA food is plentiful , we fill our bellies with what ever we may see fit, whatever looks good, Let me tell you that everything that looks good is not good for us. The obesity rate is outrageous , the heart disease rate is at an all time high, our children sit and eat and play video games rather then play outside and eat healthy , we stop and grab , convenient fast foods, and are killing the children of the future, the very generation that is going to care for us when we are elder.
Well , all this talk is good, but you don't understand what I go through. " YES actually I do, I am currently in recovery, and plan to stay in recovery each and every day, because it is a daily reprieve based on a spiritual condition , I am only as healthy as I allow my self to be, and it takes work. I cant say that I want to change and continue to do the same things, I have to pray and surrender my will, and my ways over to a loving caring God and I must and I do, trust that he will sustain the desires to self destruct. Take Pizza for example, all day long I did well, and my son says mom lets do pizza, or ice-cream or McDonalds. My first human response is that sounds good. Without thinking I am subject to say yes, ruining all my progress that day, but I can justify it by saying , Tomorrow is a new day, I will just start tomorrow, That is not recovery, that is excuses, justification, laziness and taking God for granted, using his grace as an license to do what ever I please. Think about it, do you think you would have ever seen Jesus eating a extra large, extra cheese pizza. I doubt it...
I have to capture that thought and pray right then and there in the moment , because truth be told, Yes I want pizza, yes I want McDonalds and yes I want ice-cream, and maybe all at the same time, because that is what food addicts do, they use till they are all filled up, the belly is full, but the emptiness is now even greater. There is only one way to fill that empty God spot in you and it is with God. We can eat till the cows come home. However we will be left empty, guilty, filled with regret and feeling like a failure .
Here are the steps we took. Trust me, that if you are willing to be uncomfortable for a undetermined amount of time, you will build new habits, slowly , and when those thoughts creep in, or when someone wants to influence you to eat unhealthy , you will find the courage, and you will be brave and say NO, then you will find something healthy to eat. Family and friends have good intentions, however if your serious about finding recovery from food addiction, emotional eating, over eating and filling that empty void. You must sit down with the family and friends and explain to them that you are changing and would like the support of them, Please do not offer me foods that I am trying to stay away from. They are either going to respect your wishes or they will discard them with a minimum of concern, either way, the journey is yours and yours alone. You have a choice to engage or walk away. Better yet you have the option of prayer and self control .
Here are 4 scripture verses for you to study, fix on your heart, call on God to be your strength !
Here is the link were these come from for further education on self control. SELF CONTROL
http://www.openbible.info/topics/self_discipline
Hebrews 12:11 ESV
For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
Proverbs 25:28
A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.1 Corinthians 9:24-27
Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.1 Corinthians 9:27
But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.Listen to this song, I want to see you be brave...I WANT TO SEE YOU BE BRAVE http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUQsqBqxoR4
Be blessed folks, anyway can loose the desire to use, and find a new way to live. Pray Pray Pray. Trust Trust Trust, then walk in that faith, slowly over time you will re-new your strength and see results, it will get easier over time, Just trust the process and find someone that you can be real with, honesty, open-mindedness and willingness will create a down fall of blessings you never could have imagined.
Today is a new day, Grab it, seize it, you have what it takes, God built you to last. Go march on and take control by giving up your personal control and allowing God to direct your steps...
Written with love
Live and let live
Pamela Benigno 11/18/2013
